Why Your Networking Isn't Turning Into Customers with Rob Henshaw

When your networking isn’t turning into customers, the problem usually isn’t effort – it’s approach. In this episode of From Overlooked to Consistently Booked, Meaghan talks with health coach and networker-extraordinaire Rob Henshaw about how he shifted from transactional sales tactics to authentic, relationship-driven growth.

Rob shares his powerful personal story of losing 80 pounds, reversing Type 2 diabetes, and having it removed from his medical chart – and how that transformation shaped the way he now shows up for others. Instead of pushing for the quick win, Rob plays the long game: focusing on making people feel seen, building real connections, and becoming a trusted resource in his network.

In this episode, we explore:

• Why traditional “pitch-first” networking rarely leads to real business
• The difference between transactions and true transformation
• How to become memorable even if you’re not the loudest person in the room
• What it looks like to build a referral-based business by serving first
• How authenticity, availability, and collaboration deepen trust over time
• Practical ideas for using social media to build genuine connections, not just attention

If you’ve ever wondered why your networking efforts aren’t translating into customers, this conversation will help you rethink your strategy and lean into connection as your most powerful business advantage.

Want to go deeper?
Meaghan breaks down the full framework in this month’s YouTube lesson:
How to Build a Referral Engine That Actually Works
 

Connect with Rob 

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/robbie.henshaw

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/robbiehenshaw/

Transcript

I used to be a type 2 diabetic, and I weighed over 300 pounds, and so losing 80 pounds on the program that I coach, and being able to come off diabetes medicine, and then a year later after maintaining that, the doctor removed diabetes from my chart, right? And so it's given me this new lease on life. People want to feel seen. They don't want to be sold, they want to be seen.

And so that's what I try to do. And, and I really do that in a genuine way. I, I am not a pushy kind of salesperson, because I know that doesn't work for me.

And at the end of the day, if somebody really needs my help with something, it's not something that they're going to be sold on. They're going to have to, they need to want to change themselves. And I can help them do that.

And I can give them the tools and the strategies and teach them habits. But they've got to want that for themselves more than what I want that for them. Welcome to the podcast.

I'm Megan Shitwood. You are watching From Overlooked to Fully Booked. And today we have our special guest, Rob Henshaw.

I'm excited to have you here. Thank you very much. I'm excited to be here.

You did mention that a bit earlier that this is your first podcast ever. It is. Very first podcast ever.

Listen to a bunch. What is it? A longtime listener, first time caller. There you go.

There you go. Well, I'm so happy you're here because we're talking about connections as strategy for your business. So first tell us a little bit about your business and how you've used building a network to build it.

Absolutely. So, um, I'm a health coach. I'm in the health and wellness business.

And a lot of what we do is through building just a connection with people that want to change their health for the better. And it's taken me a while to find my voice in that. And, um, but it's been a lot of fun along the way and, and, um, overcoming the, the, overcoming the mistakes that I felt like I made or, um, finding different ways to make connections with folks.

Um, and so, yeah, it's, it's been a great journey so far. So you've mentioned you started off in sales, like hardcore cold calling in a sale. In a previous life, I was in the transportation industry.

And so I was in, I was in a sales role for most of that time. And it was a lot of, a ton of cold calling, um, over the phone. I did a few years where I was just knocking on doors and I struggled with that.

Um, it was, it was hard to get through. Um, it's hard to really make a true connection with first of all, the decision maker, but, but even with like the receptionists or whatever, they see that every day and, and they feel those phone calls every day. And so it's really hard in those kinds of situations to build a relationship with people.

So I know you're in a much different spot now, which we'll get to here in just a moment. Did you figure out though, while you were doing the hard sales, did you figure out a way to try and network your way in, or was it always just straight sales? It really was always just straight sales. Um, I did, um, somewhere in the transition between being in transportation and being a health coach.

Um, I, I did go to some like chamber events to try to network and try to put myself in the right place to meet the right people. Um, and you know, I would go to those events thinking that I'm just going to make this introduction. I'm going to give them my business card.

They're going to call me. This is going to work. And no, it did not work for me.

It didn't work. Yeah. Didn't work at all.

Yeah. Because of the, what I call the networking disconnect, right? Yeah. Yes.

Absolutely. Yeah. So people go to pitch their business, but they don't go to buy something.

Right. Right. Yeah.

Yeah. So did you approach your, your health and wellness business like the sales or did you quickly realize, okay, this isn't going to work and try something else? That's a great question. So at originally, yes, I did approach it like sales.

And, and the reason that I did was I felt like I had a, and I do, I have a great story for myself in, in the transformation that I've made. Um, I used to be a type two diabetic and I weighed over 300 pounds. And so losing 80 pounds on the program that I coach and being able to come off diabetes medicine.

And then a year later, after maintaining that, the doctor removed diabetes from my chart. Right. And so it's given me this new lease on life.

And, and I've realized along the way, I need to share that with other people because I'm not a unicorn. The program that, that my wife and I coach, we can help other people realize health. And so, but I did, I approached it the same way because I still thought of it as sales.

And, and there was a shift, um, a few months into it when I just, I realized that's not going to work. This, this, the same thing that, that I had been doing with just, you know, trying to introduce myself to someone and just trying to close the deal right then. That doesn't, it doesn't work for me.

And I had to figure out what worked for me. And so it really is about relationships. And, and it's about being interested in someone else instead of trying to be interesting to them.

So sales is like a short term, right? You could get a win today. You could get a sale today if you approach something from the sales perspective. And then what you're talking about with making connections is you're not going to necessarily ask for the sale today.

You're going to build the relationship, which means. So how did you find yourself balancing the short term with the long term and the needs of your business and your business growth? That's yeah, that's a good question. Um, it, it, it took some balance and, and it took me, um, it took trial and error.

And yeah, there are, there's a little hanging fruit that you, that you, you know, realize that's, you know, that you can, um, you know, try to, in a sense, close those nice types of deals. Um, but, but at the end of the day though, that, I don't know how I want to say it. Um, in what I do and being able to help people, um, there's, to me, there's no such thing as, um, just closing the deal.

Uh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because I mean, I still have some of the first, very first people that I helped. I still have relationships with those people, even though they've, they've either, um, gone on to not use our program anymore because they're in a healthy spot and they're, they're just maintaining or they, um, decided that they didn't want to do it anymore.

Yeah. Um, I'm still friends with those people. There's no, there's no hard feelings.

Uh, and I still try to have a, you know, a relationship with them because it may have been timing. Maybe the timing wasn't right. And so if I continue to give, give of myself and, and try to help them and serve them, then eventually it may come back.

I like to say it's faith, right? Like you kind of have to go out on faith on it. And I know that word could be triggering in some ways, but it really is about if this will come back to me, if I just, if I send enough energy out, the energy will come back. So if I give enough, and you are one of the masters at real connections because it never feels like you're pressuring it, you're pushing it and all that kind of stuff.

So how do you feel like, how do you build real connections with people? Just by, by being interested in them and, and finding ways that I can serve them and help them and connect them with other people that I know, what are, what are they, what are you trying to do? Yeah. Right. And how can I help you do that? How can I help you accomplish your goals? Whatever those goals are.

Yeah. And it may not, may not have anything to do with health. And, and, and so, but by building that relationship and helping other people and serving other people, that when the time comes and if I'm being consistent in sharing my story and, and if I'm being true to who I am, then my hope is that when it comes time for them to think about their health or think about what I do, that they will think of me and, and come to me for your help.

So one strategy you use is you surround yourself and you've built relationships with other professionals that have different products and services, right? You've got a ton of different resources around you that if, if I said, Hey, Rob, can you introduce me to a real estate agent? The answer would be absolutely yes. Yes. Maybe four.

Right. You do, right. Yeah.

Um, so you really can genuinely have that curiosity because you've got all these other resources. So even if I'm not talking about health, I can talk, you can say, Oh, I can help you with health. I can help you with real estate.

I can help you with business. I can help you. I can help you in a lot of different ways.

Yeah. Just as how can I help. You got weeds in your yard? Hey, I know, I know this guy.

Let me, let me get him to, to come give you a quote on that or, you know, let me see if he can help you. Yeah. Um, you know, you're having, having problems with your, um, health insurance.

I have somebody that might, that might be able to help you with that. Yeah. Let me see if I can help.

Yeah. A friend of mine, uh, his name's Frank and he does business with Salt in New York. And one day this was back before cell phones.

So they caught, somebody called his home phone and his wife answered and they said, Hey, I'm, I'm looking for Frank. Does, uh, just, I'm looking for like truck tires, like industrial size, six foot diameter truck tires. And so Frank's wife was like, okay, I'll have Frank call you when he comes home.

And so Frank comes home and she's like, are you selling truck tires now? And he said, no, I'm not selling truck tires. But when they think when they need business consulting, they think of me or they need truck tires and they need business consulting. They're going to think of me too.

Right. So it's planting all those seeds all over the place. Yeah.

Um, so one of the things that I love about your story is, is your story of, of going from, I'm going to call it diabetic to non, not diabetic anymore. Right. If we're on your chart, um, anymore.

And I just think of that as being so memorable. And if somebody needs to, if somebody needs to lose 80 pounds, like you're the guy, cause I know you've already done it. Like, how do you find, cause you're also have a quieter, you have a quieter energy when you enter a room.

It's not like you throw the doors open and like, oh, Rob's here. So how do you make your, how do you feel like you make yourself memorable? Yeah. Yeah.

I'm definitely not the, the walking in the door and hey, it's Norm. Cheers. That's not me.

Um, I try to be, I, I, I go back to, I still try to be interested in other people. And people want to feel seen. Yeah.

They don't want to, they don't want to be sold. They want to be seen. Yeah.

And, and so that's, that's what I try to do. And, and I really do that in a genuine way. Uh, I, I am not a pushy kind of salesperson because I know that doesn't work for me.

And at the end of the day, if somebody really needs my help with something, it's not something that they're going to be sold on, they're going to have to, they need to want to change themselves and I can help them do that and I can give them the tools and the strategies and teach them habits, but they've got to want that for themselves more than what I want that for them. And, and so it's, it's just building that relationship and being kind and generous, um, where we, we become kind of sticky with those people. Well, it's really interesting that you say, but, cause you, it's not, you're not memorable about you.

You're memorable about how you've made somebody feel in the moment that you've, they've given that, and that's, that's a huge, that's a huge lesson. I'm like, if you, if you plant that in enough places, like I said, it'll come back to you for sure. Absolutely.

Yeah. So what have you seen as the ripple effect of the networking you've done and all the things you've learned from going through the journey of being, I'm going to call it peer sales to this really relational space and a really relational business? Um, it's so much more rewarding to, um, to just be more genuinely interested in people and not trying to sell them anything. Um, and I, and I think the thing that I've learned is you have to be authentic to who you are.

Um, and, and I've even had some experiences where I have developed a relationships with like professional coaches, um, that, and, and they have that kind of, you know, energy where they walk in a room and, and the presence. And, and, and at first, when I first got to know those, those folks, it's like, I'm, that's what I want to be. But I realized the longer that I was around that, that they're always trying to close the deal.

They've always got an event that they're doing that they want you to pay for today. Or they've always got a book that they're selling that they'll, you know, try to get you to buy it today. And that's just, that's just not me.

And so if, if, if I want to make an impact with somebody and I want it to be real and memorable, I'm not going to try to sell them right away. I'm, I'm going to wait till, till they bring it up. I'm just going to be myself and I'm going to play a long game.

It is a long game, but you know what? Health to me is, is so much more of a journey than it is a destination. Might be the longest game, right? It's trying to stay healthy for your entire life. Exactly.

Yeah. But that also translates into other businesses too. And, um, you know, I think that can be useful for a lot of people in a lot of the businesses that they're in is, I mean, insurance or real estate or whatever.

You just, any number of things, it's more about creating legacy and, and creating, being authentic to who you are and just trying to develop those real relationships with people. Well, and, and bringing that connection as a strategy, I don't think you can really connect with people if you aren't being authentic, right? So it is, you don't have to be that person or you don't have to be like, Oh, that's the person I'm supposed to, I'm supposed to mimic. It's really, I think, searching for who you are and what is going to be special about you, right? What's, what's that thing? I recently heard about a great exercise to do.

They said, don't do this with your family members because your family members won't. But go out to your friends and ask them like, what makes me special? Like just what makes them special? For then you can start feeling that you can start identifying what are those small little pieces that, that I can take as, Oh, that's going to be what my lead in is, right? And it might be good listener. It might be good connector, or it might be whatever that is.

And, and leaning into it so that you are available to connect with other people as well. Available. You said available.

That, that word is, is, I was actually thinking about that this morning on the drive up here. Um, so being available to people, whether they, whether it's whatever they need, but just being available. I think that really, that truly makes that connection a lot deeper.

And saying yes, even when it might be inconvenient, you know, if they need some help with something, yeah. Um, even when, you know, it is going to be kind of tough to fit in, in your schedule or whatever the case is, but being available and saying yes. And, um, just being there for other people.

Yeah. What did the journey from the sales sale be more salesy too? And like, what, what was that like? When did you really feel like you stepped in it and you really needed to take a different turn? Um, yeah, I, I truly used to be all about the transaction rather than, um, the transformation. And even once I started health coaching, I was still more at the, to begin with, I was still more about the transaction.

Um. Could you tell how people were responding to that compared to how they respond to you now? Oh, absolutely. So what was that, what was their response like? Um, it was, it was, usually it was cordial.

Cause I've, I've always tried to be, you know, friendly person, easy, approachable, um, and that's just a lot of who I am, I think, but people have this sixth sense about being sold. Um, the sales resistance, I think is the term I've heard. And so, you know, I mean, I can, you can tell if, you know, you're, um, in a conversation with somebody and, and you're, if you're really trying to sell them, then that resistance is going to go up from there almost 100% of the time.

In what I've done now. I mean, obviously there are people that are successful at it, but, um, but yeah, there's, there's, there's a couple of clients early on where, um, maybe they didn't, they didn't make it past the, you know, the first 30 days of, of trying to get healthy and looking back on it, they weren't ready. And, and I pushed and, and I shouldn't have because they, they weren't ready.

So now they have this, um, I've left them with a bad taste in their mouth about what I do and about who I am and all that because of me just being too pushy and just trying to, trying to close the sale because I wanted to close the sale and, and being that transactional type of person. Um, and because, you know, what I've, what I've come to realize is that I'm truly in the transformation business and that's a, that's a long-term thing and there's nothing short-term about it. And, um.

And interesting the opportunity as well of like the short-term sale, but now that they have not ready and they probably have the stuff sitting in a box somewhere, right, and they're looking at it and they're going, that money I, I shouldn't have spent, whereas if you let it nurture it and in their time, they would have one, gotten the transformation, which is really the business they're in. And probably bought, would have bought a bunch of other products and referred friends, right? So it's also the longer game is more fruitful. It is.

In the end as well. And, you know, I, I was, I keep, this is still rattling, rattling in my head. There's this lady that I used to work with years ago when I was in transportation.

And, um, so we, we don't live, live near each other now. I used to live in the same town, but we don't anymore. Social media, Facebook, how that, we, we kind of stayed in touch.

And, and I knew that she could benefit from the, the company that I work with. Yeah. And so I had, I had made a couple of attempts to, to kind of reach out to her.

Um, but she ended up, one of those times where I reached out to her, um, she responded to it and so we had a couple of phone call conversations about things. And I was, um, and it was still early on in me coaching. Yeah.

Um, and, and so she had to figure out a few things and see if it was going to be the right, you know, fit and, and all those kinds of things. So she was going to get back with me or we were going to be back in touch. And she ended up passing away.

Oh, wow. And probably a week after I talked to her the last time on the phone. It was a health related thing? It was health related.

And I've kicked myself so many times since then. And I, I'm not pushing hard enough. I'm not pushing hard enough.

So this is when I love having a strong network of people around you because you've been trying now, who else do you know who could be planting seeds on your behalf to be able to make that, make that happen, that would keep me up at night to have that, and it's, oh my gosh, that's so, but that would be the strategy I would use, like if I could go back in time, right, is who do I know that knows her, who could be like, I know she thinks I want to sell her something, but like, we really need to make this ultimately happen. And now, now, like I said, now you have the network around you who can totally strategize to make that happen. Absolutely.

And, and I've, I've utilized that actually, you know with, with different things and having, um, clients that I've, I've brought on that will kind of vouch for, um, what we do and, and for the program. And so it is so much stronger when people hear it from other people. Yes.

Than it is me just trying to shout it from the rooftops. And that's where I, that's what I love about building a referral-based business is sometimes you can do the selling for me better than I can do the selling for me, and that's so much nicer too, because I don't want sales. So next question is, if, if you have someone, if there is someone who's just like, I desperately need a sale because I need to keep my lights on, what advice would you give them? Look for the low-hanging fruit.

Look for, you know, and that's the funny thing about, um, the business that I'm in is, it is network marketing, right? Yeah. Um, and so it, there's a lot of negative kind of perception of a lot of network marketing businesses. Yeah.

And, and even inside our company, I've run across people that are still very transactional and they're, they're like, Hey, I need to sign up three more people by the end of the month so I can get this bonus. Um, and also originally I was, I was kind of one of those coaches as well. If a client decided that they wanted to coach, or if I talked them into coaching and, um, you know, I'd, I'd try to, I wanted it more for them than they wanted it for themselves.

And so, you know, if, if someone does say, I've got to do this to keep the lights on, all right, well, let's figure out a way to do that. Yeah. And, but there's a weight, there's, there's, there's strategies that we can develop, um, or, or realize with people where they can, um, they can close clients or, um, bring people in that, that they know that they've had those health conversations with them before, um, you know, that, that know that they need it and, and maybe just need a little nudge and so, yeah.

There, there's, there's always something that you can do to try to, um, yeah, there's always something that you can do to try to, try to make that sale so you can keep the lights. Well, and I think if you've built a solid network as well, you can also go to those people and say, Hey, I need two more clients by the end of month. What are that? What, who do you know who has said this, done that, looks like this, so on that maybe, cause then you're casting a wider net, right? It's not just who do you know and where's the low hanging fruit, but I need to know where the low hanging fruit is for, for everyone.

So I think it's just start a relationship with someone who can do business with you and help you within that business as well. Absolutely. Yeah.

Yeah. And, and having, building relationships with people in similar businesses too. It doesn't have to be, um, competition.

It could be collaboration, uh, because some things that I'm good at, there may be things that they aren't good at and vice versa, some things that I'm not good at, they might be good at. And so there might be ways for them to help me and, and I can help them as well. And what are some examples of that? So a great example is, um, I've become very good friends with the owner of a, um, infusion spa.

Oh, okay. And so they offer just infusions for all sorts of different things. They also offer GLP-1s for weight loss.

And so one of the- That would be perceived as competition for sure. It, it normally it would be, right? But what I do, I don't, I don't sell GLP-1s. I sell transformation through your habits.

And so even the people that are taking the weight loss shot, I can help them develop habits so that they're not going to need that shot forever. It's a great tool. It's a fantastic tool, but it's not a long-term solution.

And, and so, you know, I've, I've become friends with, with the owner of that spa and we're able to, to really help each other because maybe there's clients that we have that are kind of stuck for whatever reason, so they could use the benefit of the GLP-1 and clients that they have that are taking GLP-1s and not getting any nutritional guidance from their doctor or whoever, I can help with that. And so it's, it's been great to build that relationship and, yeah, and see those things happen. Yeah, absolutely.

It has been so good chatting with you about this. I, you are one of the most relational people. I know it is part of your strategy.

It is awesome. One final question for you though, because you have also done a great job of flipping your strategies to use with people in person to also social media. And I feel like I'm building a relationship with you every single time I see a post that you, that you make in some shape or fashion.

How did you transition into that as a strategy? That's, that's been a long, long game too. But you know what it comes back to? This being authentic. I'm, I'm going to share cool things and I'm going to share things that just happen in my life and, and good things, but I'm also going to share bad things.

There's so many times on social media where people, you only see the, the, the good things and you only see the highlight reels. Um, but if, if I'm having a crappy day and, and there's something that, you know, maybe that I've done that I've screwed up or, or whatever the case is. Yeah.

I'm going to talk about that too. And because we all have those things, but how we, if we can make ourselves relatable to other people, because everybody has bad days. Yeah.

And, and so if you can make yourself relatable, um, that's just going to, going to help you, um, because you're going to end up, they're going to, people will connect in the valley a lot more than they connect in the mountaintops. Oh, interesting. Yeah.

Okay. So I'm terrible about social media. I don't do it.

I find myself to be very authentic, but I cannot get in the habit of doing it. What is the best perch for me to get over myself and just do it? Get over yourself and just do it. Get over yourself and just do it.

Um, and that's truly what it is because what other people, let me, let me ask you this, what do you, what's your fear behind it? Um, that it's too much. Look at me. Look at me.

Yeah. You know what? What other people think about you is none of your business, Megan. It's none of your business.

What other people think about you? But what do I, what, but what do I think about me as I'm doing it? Not their question. Are you, are you trying to share who you are authentically? Oh, that's a solid question. I mean, when I tell my story, people find it inspiring and people do find it helpful.

Um, so I, I suppose that, yeah, if I looked at it from somebody's going to get this message and someone's going to be helped, I imagine that's probably what's going through your head as well. Then, um, but then the habit, I guess, kind of made in the habit of it, it, it takes effort and, and either finding time every day to do that or four times a week or whatever you feel like your, you know, your rhythm needs to be. But what I tend to do is, um, I just, I make time on my schedule and I block it out on my calendar that, Hey, I'm going to work on some social media stuff for this hour, this day, and you have to honor that.

Yeah. And, and so, but the more that you do that and the more you will think about ways of using your daily life in your social media too, um, and you know, people just connect with all kinds of things, but the more that they understand who you are, the more that they're going to trust you. Yeah.

And, and so if we're being our real selves, then, then that's only going to help them build that relationship. So fantastic segue into our next month's topic, because we are going to talk about time blocking and how to systemize the relationship building that we've talked about today, and how do you like really turn that into a system that will produce results for you at any, at any time. So thank you so much for being a part of the show.

Next episode, we are talking about how do you take these relationships, systemize them and time block to make it all work together. So Rob, how can people connect with you if they want to talk to you about other business things or your business? If you want to connect with me, you can find me on Facebook and Instagram. Um, Rob Henshaw.

Um, I think on the Instagram, there's some underscores there or something, but, um, you can find me on social media. So yeah, please reach out. Happy to chat about health or business or pretty much anything.

So yeah. Awesome. Thank you so much for being here.

Thank you for having me. I really, truly appreciate it. Yeah, that was great.